My friend, a girl from work, calls herself a commitment phobe. She had been dating this guy for a couple of months and just this morning they made it official. She is slightly anxious, but otherwise good with moving ahead with being in a relationship.A two and a half years ago I met this guy. We went on a few dates spanned over about 6 weeks. He was clearly far more into me than I was him. I eventually told him I wasn't feeling the same way he was. I stopped hearing from him after that.
A few months go by and he re-requests me on Facebook. So I add him. We chat on FB chat thing a few times a week. He asks if we could go for coffee sometime. I find a reason not to go.
Just before Christmas he says "Hey, you do know that we've kept in touch after all this time, right?". Hmmm....I honestly hadn't given any thought to it but yeah, we have kept in touch after our brief dating stint. I see the point he is making. He continues asking to go for coffee. I keep putting him off. Wash, rinse, repeat. He has even gone so far as to say "I don't know why, but i still like you" - the "I don't know why" because I keep putting him off. He is persistant if nothing else. He joked "we could be married with kids by now".
Then tonight as I'm driving home from work I thought: what if I'M the commitment phobe this time?
I firmly believe when we first met it was a matter of poor timing. I wasn't ready to date someone. And at that time, because of not being ready, didn't develop feelings for him.
He's not exactly my type, but is a good guy. Has a good job, just recently built a house...he's got his shit together. What if I keep putting him off because I'm afraid it might actually work out? Because he's a good guy, am I afraid it may turn into something serious?
Sure sounds like a commitment phobe to me.
Well, you won't know if you don't try!! Good Luck!
ReplyDeleteLord knows I have pushed my share of guys away. I wonder sometimes what I could have had if it wasn't for me and my issues.
ReplyDeleteNow, I don't think you should go out with someone just so you have someone to go out with, but if you are having some fears, the only way to conquer them is to get to the root of the problem and ask WHY you're having those fears.